Dec 20 2015, 05:55 AM

well okay so Lois died on Friday morning, and it's really killing me. I feel awful and I miss her and everything she was such a wonderful person and had a beautiful perspective on life. I love you Lois.

Nov 27 2015, 03:59 AM

I feel so intense whenever I'm with him and it makes me so extremely happy. My outlook on life has gotten better and I stopped taking my medicine for good two days ago! I am so proud of myself, honestly. Life is looking up and I am so ready for the times to come. I haven't been this happy since over two years ago when the depression started. I am hopeful that it is ending. Thank you, my special, special boy <3

Nov 27 2015, 03:55 AM

I just like him so much o~o

Mar 11 2015, 06:37 PM

It's not like I want to die, but for right now, being alive and going through these pointless days is making me so sad. I feel like I shouldn't be where I am. I cannot interact with the others too well. I wish to be away from them; tucked away. If only. Suicide seems too extreme because you aren't actually able to enjoy the silence and distance. You're just dead. I guess I'm just super sad. I don't know how to cope with this pain. Cutting myself helps a lot, but it's getting hotter and harder to conceal parts of my body that I usually tend to slice. Ugh. I also feel like I have just a ton of triggers everywhere. I can't control how they make me feel. Everywhere at school; it's a person, a room, and object... They get to me, they cause me to experience the pain that I am currently in. If I were dead, there would be no pain, but there also would be no consciousness of me knowing that I could finally be in peace. Life is difficult, and I want to preserver, but I have no idea how to do that. I am drowning. I'm so apathetic and a non-ending cycle of self-loathing has been consuming my soul.

Mar 09 2015, 07:36 PM

Feeling lonely and bland... :c