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SITE/CHAT REMINDER - Mar 12 2018, 02:16 AM

Avalanche - soEmo.co.uk

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Daily reminder that suicide and self-harm discussion in the main chat is breaking the rules.

*Also note that gaslighting people, threatening suicide over your relationship drama counts as bullying and harassment as well as suicide/self-harm discussion, and it's also disgusting and abusive.*

Also note that lying about mental illness and self-harm counts as fraud.

Continuous behaviours are a bannable offense,not to mention the soemo discord keeps track of users, screenshots of their actions, and how many offenses that go against site and chat rules they have made.

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Total Forum Posts: 8

xXeMoRaCeRXx - soEmo.co.uk

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Mar 12 2018, 10:49 AM

Thank you for posting this.
Regarding "suicide and self-harm discussion" this can be discussed in the Help and Advice chat room, but only to actually help each other. In no way do we allow any promotion of self harm.

Also images on people profiles showing self harm are removed.
Erebus - soEmo.co.uk

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Mar 12 2018, 03:40 PM


To Avalanche's Credit, I understand the purpose of the Help And Advice room, but what happens there is... not help or advice.

The vast majority of what goes on in there recently is relationship drama, and it seems to follow a sort of vague pattern of

1) Person A hooks up with Person B on this site
2) Around a Day or two, maybe three, something happens and they break up, Person A and B then goes into a depressing episode.
3) Person A goes into Help and Advice and Rants about it, including the occasional mentions of nooses, self harm, and just threatening suicide in general over breaking up with Person B.
4) A number of people from The Hangout who also happen to be friends with Person A might sometimes appear in Help and Advice and tend to exacerbate the problem by being whipped into a sort of "Mob frenzy" against Person B but never any actual harmful actions other than arguing against Person B.
4A (This doesn't always happen)) Person B enters Help And Advice and attempts to apologize to Person A for any harm done, but this normally elicits a negative, usually hostile reaction from Person A, and then Person A and their entourage starts attacking Person B while Person B keeps making futile attempts to apologize while starting to go into a sort of suicidal mindset over the course of their time in Help And Advice.
5) Person A or Person B usually end the conversation with "I'm done. Goodbye" and then they leave both Help And Advice (And The Hangout sometimes).
6 (If Person B is in Help and Advice as well)) Person B does the same as Person A Does in step 5
7) The Cycle repeats, Person A gets with someone else while having a lasting hostility towards Person B which lasts for a few days

This is pretty much what has been happening in Help and Advice lately. There is no "Help" or "Advice" occurring at all, just what can be summed up as emotional blackmail and false threats of suicide as an attempt to "Get back" at whoever Person B tends to be, while Person A gets with another person and begins the entire cycle again.

Another thing is, Person A Tends to be the same few number of people. Person B can be anyone that shows interest in Person A.

Frankly, I myself am getting quite tired of it.
The_Great_Cornholio - soEmo.co.uk

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Mar 12 2018, 09:21 PM

I agree with this. It's getting out of hand.
_MusicalCupCake_ - soEmo.co.uk

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Mar 13 2018, 06:00 PM

To be honest, the drama Erebus spoke about is the main reason some people (including me) don't come onto the site as much anymore. The site itself is great no doubt, I still love it even after so long.
But the people are starting to ruin it for me. Chat isn't as fun as it used to be unfortunately, due to people acting so immature.
Avalanche - soEmo.co.uk

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Mar 13 2018, 06:38 PM

I'm so sorry you've had such a negative experience, I know how frustrating it can be to deal with such people time and time again on the site...
Personally I've come to find the few decent people that can be found on the site make it all worthwhile and a lot of people tend to grow out of their immature ways.

At the end of the day a couple of mods have banded together and we are very hopeful for the future of the site and hope one day things can stay fun and peaceful but not too stagnant, it is a very difficult balance to find.

We can only hope that one day from staying on the same page with one another, having clearer communication with admins, and by not taking anyone's drama or BS we will slowly pave a way to a community with more clarity.
Mish - soEmo.co.uk

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Mar 14 2018, 01:03 AM

It IS getting old. And also a reminder: asking someone for nudes or to sext is NOT okay. Please, keep your privates in your pants and quit spreading drama. It’s immature, and definitely not what anyone wants to see.
ScaredStraight - soEmo.co.uk

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Mar 14 2018, 04:31 AM

I completely agree with Avalanche, it's one of the reasons why I hope to because a mod when I turn 16 because i want to help the site and make it better to where people want to come back and not stay away.
holy - soEmo.co.uk

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May 15 2018, 03:01 PM

Very delayed response (thanks registration time), but I think people need to understand that drama will always accompany online social platforms, especially those geared towards the alternative scene because that's where most teens feel they fit in. On top of that, they haven't been taught proper coping strategies or how to handle stressful situations.

The more people who remain unbiased, the more likely the drama issue will resolve itself.
In a lot of cases, people looking for advice aren't really seeking advice, just justification as to why their behavior is correct and the behavior of anyone else involved is wrong.

Perhaps, in situations where Person A and Person B both access the site, we encourage use of the block feature.
If neither of the involved parties wish to utilize said feature, a temporary suspension could be put in place maybe?
This would show people that often times, they are capable of solving their own problems, they just choose not to. And it would also show people that intentionally creating drama and hostility will not be tolerated to any extent.

Total Forum Posts: 8

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