Jun 28 2018, 08:02 AM

i cannot wait for kai to come home! it's only one more month before he comes back. i've been so lonely ;-; ...

Jun 28 2018, 06:03 AM

never surrender damaged so perfectly quiet, like a snake I slither around making sure that I eat her heart out! [chorus] oh-wah-oh-oh oh dancing to the beat of the drums I scream at the top of my lungs that in my heart we're apart but I know I can do this if I just get a grip in my eyes are tears as I cut away with shears, I'm sorry. I'm sorry OH! oh no wah no oh [chorus end] this my heartbeat breaking on the fucking floor make sure that I DIE IN VAIN! I SCREAM AT THE VOICES I WON'T DO YOUR CHOICES AND THAT I WILL NEVER GIVE UP MY LIFE TO YOU, oh dadadaa da! You know what? You know what the fuck's goin' on, in my brain!? You wanna know!? I WILL NEVER SURRENDER OR SUCCUMB TO THE WINDS OF MY DEATHS. I WILL NEVER LET MY SOUL BE REAPED OR MY BONES BE RIPPED AWAY! Now, now, now- Don't touch me like that! AAAH! HAVE YOU HEARD ME YET!? [chorus x2] I WILL NEVER SURRENDER OR SUCCUMB TO THE WINDS OF MY DEATHS. I WILL NEVER LET MY SOUL BE REAPED OR MY BONES BE RIPPED AWAY! Danger lurks in every turn, You haven't earned, what you get is what you want! I wrapped my head in blood and killed myself the way I should, bitch! Never scream my name in bed you monster, oh wait but he will! [chorus] I WILL NEVER SURRENDER OR SUCCUMB TO THE WINDS OF MY DEATHS. I WILL NEVER LET MY SOUL BE REAPED OR MY BONES BE RIPPED AWAY! (AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!, in the background throughout) I WILL NEVER SURRENDER OR SUCCUMB TO THE WINDS OF MY DEATHS. I WILL NEVER LET MY SOUL BE REAPED OR MY BONES BE RIPPED AWAY! this my heartbeat breaking on the fucking floor make sure that I DIE IN VAIN! I SCREAM AT THE VOICES I WON'T DO YOUR CHOICES AND THAT I WILL NEVER GIVE UP MY LIFE TO YOU, oh dadadaa da! this my heartbeat breaking on the fucking floor make sure that I DIE IN VAIN! I SCREAM AT THE VOICES I WON'T DO YOUR CHOICES AND THAT I WILL NEVER GIVE UP MY LIFE TO YOU, oh [chorus x2] (screaming fading) [chorus] [whispered, not song, music stopped] this my heartbeat breaking on the fucking floor make sure that I DIE IN VAIN! I SCREAM AT THE VOICES I WON'T DO YOUR CHOICES AND THAT I WILL NEVER GIVE UP MY LIFE TO YOU, oh

Jun 28 2018, 05:37 AM

ugh kill me rn i need to stop hallucinating i fucking miss him i want him i need him i love you and i hate myself for messing us up

Jun 28 2018, 03:46 AM

i just started scratching myself with sharp shit again.. fuck.. welp, there goes being clean.. it was two fucking years of cleanness.. all because of my mom abusing me.. i fucking didn't even realize that she was abusing me since the start... i need to get out soon... i hate being "A.S."... i'm sorry its my fault... i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm goddamn fucking sorry