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the phantom of the opera is there! inside my mind. sing once again with me our strange duet my power over you grows stronger yet! the phantom of the opera, by andrew loyde webber

Emo Forums » Emo Poetry (Reply)

Emo Pictures - WitherdRose
WitherdRose
Posts: 1459
Behind these black eyes Sep 15 2008, 07:22 AM
Well this is my second poem; its not one of my best but its easy to understand and really hits home on the issue at hand. Pretty girl mets Handsome boy, Hand in Hand they shall destroy, Dreams shall be shattered, Tears shall run, Hearts will be broken, For this is no fun, She gets paronoid, He gets mad, She raises her voices, He raises his hand, She says stuff she shouldn't say, Then on the floor she shall lay, For he has hit her with such might, As her blood is shead tonight, He says sorry, She screams get away, He says it was a mistake, She says it's to late, But in the morning all is well, Apperently she bumped her head and fell, But behind the smiles she shall always fear, That she shall shead another tear, please tell me what you think :D

Replies

Emo Pictures - sinister-kisses
sinister-kisses
Posts: 14
Sep 16 2008, 10:06 AM
wow i love it. its incredible. it really does express the issue well
Sep 16 2008, 02:58 PM
i like it....its very good
Emo Pictures - xXeMoRaCeRXx
xXeMoRaCeRXx
Posts: 18235
Sep 17 2008, 12:38 PM
In my opinion it's very good, but I'm not keen on the first line "Pretty girl mets Handsome boy". Not sure why, but there you go.
Emo Pictures - WitherdRose
WitherdRose
Posts: 1459
Sep 18 2008, 11:45 PM
well thanks for your honesty

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