Hey thanks for my first long comment. I used to sign onto MSN and even talk to a number of people at once. These days I just don't get the time really to hardly go on at all. In a way I miss it but only the interesting more than one word answer conversations. Really try and avoid them because later you'll think back and realise you could have been doing something more useful I'm sure. My life is fairly busy yea with work, going out here and there, having a g/f and working on soEMO.co.uk. BUT the main thing I really want to do is move out again. It's just having the time to sort things out, etc. I expect my life to change a fair bit this year. I bet your not boring at all. When I finished uni and didn't have a job for a number of months I had lots of spare time :] I miss it. I don't sleep enough your right. Working 5 days a week sucks. Bring back uni life!! I haven't read up on it, but so many people say if they sleep for ages they feel more tired than if they slept for say 6/7 hours. Ahhh alcoholic...I enjoy a fair bit of that. Finally i'll end on a random note. I love the word "murky" not sure why though. See I took the time to return your comment. Matt x

Hmmm, not 2 sure if splitting the comment up has made it come through as more disjointed ramblings than usual :-s x

Challenge, debate: Miserable sods indeed, I think it stems from the fact that the majority of people I interact with, not wanting to push themselves to have any kind of meaningful exchange with others. Well credit where credit is due I always believe. That along with manners cost nothing, hehe ok noted, I dont want to end up setting your expectation of others too high. :P Fun fun fun: Hmmm I was where you are for quite a while with regards to fun, letting loose etc. Once I found my inner confidence it all changed and I started creating my own fun and attending parties etc regardless. Trust me youll find your niche. Ekkk sounds a little like some of my first experiences and I can relate to the asthma complications, Im a sufferer too, fairly mild now though, used to be rather restrictive when I was younger. Haha sounds like you learnt a valuable lesson, I learnt a similar one, many, many, many years ago :P Ahem, yes stories *Andy does a quick mental filtering of stories not on Do not speak of list*oh oh oh, got one. A few years ago after a particularly exceptionally good few nights in Sheffield, myself & 6 or 7 friends was not quite ready 2 head home, we had been to GateCrashers red & black event (so we was all dressed in black & red cyberwear, all had spiked & gridded hair in alternate black & red paint spikes, half of us had black contacts in, the rest had red, black and red face paint), then gone onto Insomniacz and was still wanting to keep going. As nowhere was open we decided to pay Sheffield cathedral a visit for afternoon service, all of us still very, very intoxicated, still all in full cyber, looking like something that hell was too scared of, sat in the front rows of the cathedral attempting to singing hymns with inverted crosses on our foreheads (after a little eyeliner work from one of the group), oddly we got asked to leave. :D Music: This will be a work in progress, I shall update my profile with the bands I am currently listening to, I wont put everything I listen to as that could take forever. Pet hates & Intelligent Connection / Relate to: Haha its all good and dont worry about it, I have always had a way with the ladies ;-).hehehehe, sorry! Gay bars: Ahem yes well, Im happy to make your day and cheer you up :D As I said they are dark tales of dark times, I do have copies of related photographs and on occasion they do see the light of day :s. I shall give you a little further mood enhancer, in that as part of my duties whilst working as a dancer/entertainer shall we say in said bars, was to in fact become familiar with and re-enact certain movement routines that had been arranged to works by a popular music group of the time known as Steps, an example being Tragedy, and to this day, trying to forget those routines is a little bit like trying to get a Chav to count to more than five! :P Lengthy response(s): No problem at all on the time taken, I had by that point started arguing with the sofa over its failure to go and make me a drink of tea and the coffee table had strongly refused to fill in for me at work, but it was all good! :D Vegetarian: I have meant to ask earlier, how long have you been vegetarian? Is it a choice because you dont like the taste of meat or dont like the thought of eating an animal etc? I was vegetarian myself for many years, but due to circumstances I had to give up being vegetarian (one of the hardest things Ive ever had to do). Picture comment: No worries, u may find a few on your own. :D Gay Idol: Haha I wish all the little gay dudes thought I was gorgeous :PMy babies (Henri, Tom & Joel) do look after me and to a certain extent I would say do get somewhat jealous on the odd occasions I meet someone. It is very sweet and comforting a lot of the time, but can be very annoying as well. Response time: I am a amused by the amount of time this response has taken, but I feel its worth taking the time to respond and seriously consider what to say. Aww thank you, I can feel the love flow :P Love you too hun, look forward to your reply :P XxmwahxX

Andy's philosophies amended to ramblings of a madman: Right well thank you for the thanks you gave me for thanking you for the praise you had given me for the.what was we talking about? :P I agree though for future reference, we can skip the thanking of praise. A good idea I think otherwise I anticipate we shall have posts twice as lengthy, consisting mostly of the word thanks. :D Hmmm yes, well spotted my erm planted guidelines *insert innocent whistle, avoid eye contact* :P Im glad I can stimulate your curious side. Ive found curiosity a constant and valued friend. I have always loved this quote Curiosity killed the cat, but where human beings are concerned, the only thing a healthy curiosity can kill is ignorance Harry Lorayne. Im sure Ill have no hesitation in sharing my ramblings and Im sure our conversations will trigger many more than to be aired than usual. Yes Im afraid I do have to admit I am something of a kiss ass, but only on the very rare occasions that I find someone who I can relate to and have worth while exchange. :P Random friend add's, search for validation by having a high friend count: Youre correct in it being true. :D (Trying to condition myself to refrain from over using the thank yous and your welcome now :P). Haha, honey I think people will have been wondering what the hell were on about for the last several posts, I would imagine we lost most of them days ago. :P *Breath on and polish nails moment again :P* Well I did like your profile picture I have to admit :P and your name Tantra, I was curious if it was with reference to the asian beliefs and practices. Although I dont have much interest in the religious aspects, I do find parts of Tantra philosophy intriguing. Lack of communication, response and effort: Hehe great minds think alike as it seems on this then, coolies :D (just as an fyi coolies is one of my words that you probably will notice I end up using quite a bit). Pain, suffering, pandering to lower standards: Glad the pain didnt last too long. I think I need a bit more explanation on my back and legs hurt from exhaustion and standing up for hours on end. Need a massage to be honest., thats a result of, what? No problems on the delivery and the cost was well worth it :P Glad it made you smile, hehe I agree completely with your I'm not used to all this smiling you know sweetheart., Im going to end up with laughter lines at this rate. :P Stereotypes: Yeah agree with you, although in no way do I make a secret of being gay, I dont use it as a greeting! There is a story about when I did use it as a greeting once, which I shall tell you about some other time, it will make you smile. :D Making allowances for the dumb people: What can I say but I agree, agree, agree etc :D I agree so, so much with you that some people just choose to be lazy. Haha yeah I think we may just need to keep a lid on getting fed up with everyone, Ive had enough Eric & Dylan tendencies in the past already, than Im sure is healthy. Hmmm I often get somewhat pissed off with various people on Windows Live Messenger, for some reason on there I appear to become far more easily wound up. Glad I brought you another smile :P I will have to admit I do abuse the polishing nails routine, there is a whole looking away and up to the sky thing involved as well for ultimate smug effect and delivery. :D Dont worry about how long the reply takes to write, your replies are worth waiting for. :D

Insomnia, nocturnal, woozy from lack of sleep: I am very much a nocturnal person, always have been. Friends believe I am part bat (or was it some other nocturnal rodent? I forget :D) and most people dont understand how I can survive on only sleeping for a few hours per night. I actually sometimes do get woozy from lack of sleep and it ends up making me giggly, but thats usually only after Ive gone a few days without sleep at all. I agree with you there, I seem to be at my best in the early hours of the morning; thoughts seem to flow far easier for me at those times, whereas now as I am writing this, as its day time, I do have to keep stopping to think about what I am going to type. Honesty, truth and intelligent conversation: I have just worked you didnt ask a question about honesty, I think a couple of posts ago you started it with Yeah so am I to be honest, I think a little bit of the woozy from lack of sleep kicked in and I misread it as a question :P Hmmm I know a few people like the girl you mentioned, and Ill even admit that when I was younger I was one of those attention seekers and had inflated truths and down right blatant lies in what I thought would make me interesting and fit in. Fortunately I overcame all of that silliness and realized it was all part of me trying to deny being gay, who I was etc, raging against the pressures and constrictions I was feeling, but I did come upon the realization that there were enough qualities to my persona, that I was interesting without all the bullshit. If people didnt like me for who I was then it was their problem (it wasnt quite that straight forward as there was the whole girlfriend incident and lots of other factors, which I guess will come up in further discussions :P). I agree though, it is a whole other conversation / rant. :D Yeah agree with you completely with the honesty, especially when it comes to relationships, Ive been there where Ive been kept hanging for far too long and then found out pretty much everyone knew my boyfriend at the time had wanted to end it for a while. So I ended up feeling a right idiot that everyone knew and I didnt, it just made everything ten times worse, all down to a lack of honesty. Hey honey, Im happy to discuss anything you want, Im sure youll kick off on the subject if you want to discuss it, if not then thats no problem. :D I foresee that our upcoming conversations will be more interesting than I can imagine. :D Incomplete, unfilled and poorly thought out profiles: I also make a point of checking my friends profiles every so often to see if theyve added, changed or amended anything, I believe its important to do so, I suppose its linked in with the high friend count junkies who may glance at your profile once and then never look at it again. Hehe, I can sniff out acknowledgements, praise and complements etc from a mile away, you had no chance of me not reading that before you mentioned it. :P Aww, thank you and I do appreciate your kind gesture. I do get referred to as Special more often than what you would think, however I dont think its meant in the same context or in a positive way. :os Beliefs and religion: Haha my personal beliefs, philosophies and self guidelines are extensive and I never have any hesitation in sharing them with others. I dont in anyway wish to dictate any of them to anyone else, and in no way do I expect anyone to apply them to themselves, they have, and continue to build over time and perhaps may be the only thing that keeps me out of that nice little room with padded walls that I am sure is being held in wait for me somewhere. :P I shall happily accept the praise and support for my belief you have given though, coming from you, that means far more than what it usually would from people I meet. :D Hmmm religion is something of a difficult issue for me, coming from a very intensive, strict religious background and upbringing; I did develop something of a hatred towards religion at quite a young age. Although saying I hate religion may sound strong, it was a direct reaction to being forced to try and believe in something that I questioned and no-one could really give any answers to my questions. Add to that most religions views on homosexuality and my firm belief that religion plays a huge part in the worlds conflicts and problems; I do have a significant issue with religion as a whole, it has played a huge part in me not being able to have any kind of relationship with my parents. As regards my personal answer to a question such as Is there a god or gods?, I dont believe there is some all powerful being or beings that created us and this world etc. I am a firm believer (and with the overwhelming scientific evidence to support it), that we are the product of evolution, what I do strongly believe though that there is more to our existence than the lives we live here and now, I believe that as our evolution continues, we will come to understand and develop our own minds and existence to inconceivable levels. Thats perhaps why I believe that there may be another level of existence that we move onto once we die, Im not suggesting anything such as heaven, hell etc, but I think as we still understand so little about our own consciousness and the complexities of it, that maybe that consciousness moves onto something else.

Hey honey, Hi how r u? :P Aww Im glad you missed getting a message from me, must mean you are enjoying our conversations :D. Im bored at work so I thought Id write a reply. Ive think I shall separate the posts as well so it breaks it up a bit. Random, hectic weekend(s): As often happens with my weekends, last weekend turned into another random, hectic one. At approximately stupid oclock on Saturday morning, I had one of my many Im bored, cant sleep, time for some fun moments. So I had a wander out to gather some troops, in that I mean I went round to my friend Harrys and just kept banging on his door and calling him until he came down and answered. He was a little sleepy and I had woke another couple of mutual friends who were visiting from Derby and staying at Harrys. My friend Alex from Derby had a look at his phone and did say Andy, its ten past five, what you doing? Harry answered that for me Andy does this, you just get used to it after a while. :D. So anyway whilst they were getting ready I got the kettle, Kelly (other friend from Derby) wanted food, so I got the toast on. Once everyone was ready we set off down to Chesterfields Queens Park. When we got there me and Alex decided to highjack a couple of boats on the boating lake, wed taken a football and had a game of boat based, catch / volleyball then eventually just ended up throwing the ball into the water next to each others boat so we get splashed. We all got really soaked, but had great fun. Then we had about an hour on roundabout, swings, seesaw before heading back to Harrys to get changed (I seem to have more of my possessions and clothes at Harrys than I do at my own place). Then we headed into Chesterfield for breakfast at a greasy spoon caf After lunchtime (about two in the afternoon), I jumped on the train into Sheffield, I fancied a bit of culture so I decided I wanted to go to the Art Exhibition at the Winter Gardens in Sheffield. Really enjoyed that, some fantastic pieces. I then decided I fancied a drink so made my way to Lions Lair, bumped into some of my babies, Henri, Lydia & Joel, stayed in there with them getting exceptionally drunk and chatting about random subjects, one that springs to mind was If you could taste a colour, what do you think blue would taste like?. Im sure you get the idea :P Somewhere between 9:30-10, me and Lydia decided it was time for a mission, Henri & Joel set us the task of locating, retrieving and returning with one of those retractable belt things that go between two posts to create a barrier for a queue line. Sometimes have them in post offices, outside nightclubs. So we wandered off up onto West Street in Sheffield, spotted on e after about twenty minutes. We decided that a distraction was need for the bouncers, so as Lydia always gets asked for ID she got in the queue, a couple of people in front of me. When she got to the bouncers and got asked for ID she did a little bit of a strop trying to convince them to let her in, I then unhooked the belt from two of the posts and then stepped out the crowd and walked off with Lydia. We returned to Lions Lair and was bought a couple of shots by Henri & Joel :D. At about 12, me and Lydia needed to get off for the train back, got back to Chesterfield, called at the 24 hour Spar for alcohol, cigarettes and munchies. We then decided to watch Akira on DVD, and then Donnie Darko. Fell asleep on the sofa at about 6, woke up at about 9:30, got the teas on, Lydia headed home, I got ready to go see my Sister. She always does enjoy me dropping by without warning when I need feeding :D. Sunday afternoon, I went to the Howard in Sheffield, Sunday evening was kind of dull, I did some washing and then started coding some VBScript to do with work. Had a couple of hours sleep and then woke up and started writing a message to you :P

Lol, my pro pic isnt how i look like much xD Just kinda comp broke but i iz using skool one now =P And i'm all gurd you? xx wb xx

Hey sweety, I am home from work so, so late and not gonna have time to reply tonight as I need to attempt, what's it called again, oh yeah, sleep. I shall reply in full whilst at work tomorrow when I perhaps should be doing other things, but will actual enjoy the stimulus of writing a reply, arther than my usual being so bored at work I fall asleep :p. Anyway, I noticed you commented that I didn't appear to have any pictures of me smiling so I've added one, enjoy ;-) Sending loads of love your way. OurAndy XxX

Hey hun :D, Apologies for a slight delay in my reply, I've had a rather hectic weekend and simply not had the time to give a reply. I am not having one of my many insomniac moments as it's 4:47 in the morning and I should be getting up for work at 7:00, so I decided what better to do than write a reply :) I think your suggestion of headings for what I am sure will be numerous and varied debates, opinions and topics is an exceptional one and I shall employ them now. :D Honesty, truth and intelligent conversation: I respect full honesty and truth from people more than anything else. Don't ever think I will be upset or offended by you being honest, its actually quite the reverse. If I feel someone isn't being honest then I get offended and upset, so in answer to your question, yes please be honest :). I actually am looking forward to our future conversations, exchanges & discussions :) Incomplete, unfilled and poorly thought out profiles: I think we are both 'on the same page' with regard to profiles, we both appear to have the same belief that they should be a glimpse into someone's personality. I of course read through the changes you have made to your own and thank you for the acknowledgement, I am honored, it made me smile and feel all tingly and special :P No worries on the "to tell the truth there's a lot more I could add to my profile", I always believe a profile should always be a 'work in progress', it should be thought out, added to, amended and adapted as and when you feel there is something to add, change etc. Andy's philosophies, part one (Express yourself, make yourself heard): Thank you for the praise for the 'rant, rave, scream and shout', coming from yourself that means a lot and reading that you 'loved it' put a big smile on my face. I will let you into a little secret, I have many philosophies, thoughts, 'personal guidlines' such as this one, they all got scribbled into my scrap pad, to many it may appear the ramblings of a mad man, however I can see that I will end up sharing many of them with you, as I believe you may actually be able to offer either an intelligent confirmation that I may have 'hit the nail on the head' or be able to offer an intelligent challenge that I may have 'missed the mark'. Random friend add's, search for validation by having a high friend count: Hun, you are not merely in the one percent, you are infact in my 0.1 percent :). As you say though, at least there is hope for people such as ourselves. I think we both understand each other on this subject without question, I'm just happy I decided to visit your profile and we became friends :D. Lack of communication, response and effort: I do agree with you and can see you use the "hi how are you?" in much the same way I do, sometimes due to exhaustion (hehe I may have spotted one in your comment 'exhauster'), or many times I have used the phrase when I have felt that the person I am conversing with just isn't going to put any kind of effort into giving a worth while response. Again, like you I try to make the effort when communicating with people and then when all you get is a "yeah" type response to the several paragraphs you've just said, messaged to them, you just think "screw it". If they aren't interested in what I have to say, why should I be interested in you!? Pain, suffering, pandering to lower standards: I'm glad the pain didn't last too long, I would like to never have to "be reduced to such low standards", but a reality of this world I have found is all too apparent is that have to reduce oneself to the low standards of others is required many more times than should be acceptable :( Hmmm yes the Windows Live Messenger 'smiles' and 'lol's' can be rather annoying, especially when oneself has sent a thought out message and all you get is a 'smile' or a 'lol'. I hope your pain subsides soon, 'one order for a cold compress, candles and chamomile tea please, express delivery to Tantra's house' :D Andy's philosophies, part two (Embrace the moment, enjoy the present, don't worry about whats to come): I have the firm belief that what 'keeps me sane', that may be a little stretch of the truth :p, I think I'd go with 'keeps me able to not be in small room with padded walls' :D is that I live for the now, in the moment and don't really think too much about what may happen the next day. I would say I positively get a 'buzz' from not knowing what is going to happen until I decide which choice to make in relevance to that moment. You make the correct observation that it is exhilarating. Living my life in this way does give me almost a freedom from how many people I meet seem to think and gives me a means to escape the confines of being restricted by the worries of the future and bothering about circumstances that I may never end up arriving in. Stereotypes, "Around the old camp fire": Hehe, I thought you would like that one, even made myself chuckle as I was typing it. Even though I am gay, proud of it and embrace 'gay life', I don't define myself by my sexuality, I am just me, it happens to be that I am attracted to men, but it doesn't define who I am. In the same way although I acknowledge I fit into the definition of 'emo' (Cyberemo if we want to get technical), it doesn't dictate who I am, its just I feel more similarities, maybe 'connection' with people who fall into the definations of being 'emo'. Making allowances for the dumb people: It is an most unfortunate requirement in today's society that we end up having to make allowances for the "dumb people", a lot of the time I do believe people are sometimes more lazy than dumb, but it always seems that its the people who make the effort end up having to make extra effort to compensate for other peoples laziness and shortcomings. The incentive for me and you to keep talking to each other is paramount, we may infact be the last great hop for intelligent civilisation *Andy breathes on and polishes his nails again* :D Challenge, debate: Haha, I will admit that I very often will make a comment, suggestion etc to get a reaction or response, I thought you would like the "Keeping you on my toes" and I'm glad it brought a smile to your face. You are correct that I don't need you or anyone to actually "keep me on my toes" as I do push myself to achieve more despite the chaos that is my mind, however on the very, very rare occasion that I meet and exchange with someone who can "keep me on my toes", I find it extremely exhilarating and stimulating. I will confess that at present you are actually 'head and shoulders' above other people I have talked with, with regard to intelligent discussion and exchange :D Fun fun fun: I'm sure you have no problems at all in having fun, I have the feeling that you can 'party' with the best of them. I perhaps have a little too much fun and do often miss being able to challenge my thoughts and mind, however now we are friends I am sure that I won't have that lacking in my existence any longer! :D All smiles: Haha sometimes abbreviation is necessary when its designed to 'bring a smile'. Kill Hannah: Well initially I had a browse around their 'myspace' and listened to the tracks on there, I have now downloaded the album 'For Never & Ever' after the suggestion of my friend. Really enjoying it, I must admit. Any recommendations for other material I should have a listen to? Spelling mistakes & re-education: Hehe, I planted the mistakes in there, honestly :D (insert 'lol' here if signed into Windows Live Messenger :P). I will acknowedge I am still in a process of re-educating myself, especially when it comes to spelling. My schooling had a rather obscure method of teaching spelling which was a lot of 'spell how it sounds' then attempting to change that thinking to spelling correctly, it resulted in a rather difficult to overcome thought process of 'spelling' for me. However I am getting there with changing my approach / re-education on spelling. 'Try Hards': I'm glad you have experienced it to with the ones who try to "mold themselves", I have no problem with people who 'change' because it's what they want to do and and feel it is right for them, it's just the ones who do it to try to fit into a part of society that they normally wouldn't. I as you was much the same, grew up with alternative / rock music, it was what I liked to listen to and although I wandered off into such things as GateCrasher etc, dance, trance I never stopped listening to alternative / rock. Profile editing: I did indeed go through it and corrected my "text speak" and spelling error's and I have correct the other two you spotted. It's no problems me doing it "All for little ol' me!" and I agree that "ol'" is correct as opposed to typing 'old'. Pet hates & Intelligent Connection / Relate to: Likewise I am glad I have found someone I can relate to as well, it's a rare thing in the reality of this world and I am please we have met. I am sure that the honor will be mine (cliche?) speaking to you. Hmmm yes I will acknowledge the 'theropy' was just just sloppy :D Hugs & Warnings: Haha well the 'warning' was a little tongue in cheek, however the hug(s) are always available :D Gay denial, trying to please everyone but myself, Gay bars: I will admit it was a rough / difficult time and I could perhaps say 'if I had my time again, I would, blah, blah, blah', however I always believe my life has taken the path it has, and made me, me, so perhaps I would be different and even worse off mentally than I am now if things had happened differently. I am sure you did have a big old grin with the "Gay Bar Thing!", there are other dark tales & pictures of 'drag' nights that appeared to be a really fun idea at the time, but they are now added to the 'don't speak of' list :D I definately have no recollection of such events *nervous whistle, then lalalalalalalalalala* Lenghty response(s): Ahem, yes I am just noticing how long this comment is and just realised I have been typing a response for about two hours :S Rating, picture comment: Thank you so much for the rating and comment on my picture, you didn't have to, however they are very much appreciated. You didn't direct my attention to the fact that there is a rating system as well on here! Must be my age, I had missed it do before :) I have tried not to the usual 'responsive rating' on your profile, but I hadn't seen it before so that's my excuse, I have utilised the feature now though. Stalker?: No I don't believe you're a stalker in anyway, shape or form. I just believe that you, as I do perhaps have found someone who you may be able to have fufilling and intelligent exchange with and it is rather an attractive and compelling find :D Right well, I now need to debate it I shall infact bother going into work today and do now feel tired, even thought its 7:09 in the morning. Damn, bugger! Lots of love heading your way <3 x

Yeahhh XD Tehe And I got the pics to work (: Ahahaha. Beat the system XD Maybeeee... Tehe. God I'm so bruised from Aiden. My right knee is purple. But I grabbed wiL's arse so it's worth it (: *dances* I can't wait for them to come back in October !